My second Faith & Family Business series considers the book of Proverbs. Though written thousands of years ago, these proverbs still have a timeliness and power today. My aim is to consider these maxims in the context of our current experience of living and working with family members. Thanks for your feedback and sharing this post with others.
Giving and receiving feedback is a constant reality in our professional and personal lives. The reading today describes how certain types of people will hear your efforts to correct or coach them:
Whoever corrects a scoffer gets himself abuse, and he who reproves a wicked man incurs injury. Do not reprove a scoffer, or he will hate you; reprove a wise man, and he will love you. Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be still wiser; teach a righteous man, and he will increase in learning. (Prov. 9:7-9)
You’ve probably experienced both kinds of people: someone reacting negatively to your reprimand, while someone else appreciating your coaching. But I’d like you to consider these verses from the standpoint of receiving, instead of giving, feedback or criticism.
When we are reproached or rebuked by someone, we often get mad or defensive, we create excuses, or we dismiss the criticism. However, our opportunity to gain the wisdom of Proverbs lies in how we use that instruction to become better. When someone gave me difficult-to-hear feedback in school, at work, or as a part of other organizations, I became a better person if I reflected on the critique and considered what might be useful to my development.
Has your attempt to correct or give someone advice in the family business ever been received negatively? Are you a “wise receiver” of criticism and feedback?